WHY CAN'T I FOCUS

For some reason, the week before every quarter/semester ends, I lose motivation and get really lazy and stop caring about school. I'm really not sure why this happens, but I can't even remember a time when this hasn't happened.

I have never felt so unmotivated to study, nor have I ever cared less. Even when I drag myself to go to the library, my mind keeps wandering and I can't focus at all. I've honestly been like this all quarter, and that is why my grades have never been worse. This is a habit I really need to change, but I'm having so much difficulty getting over it; there's just constantly too much on my mind. It seems like for the past two years, my whole life has revolved around school. I suppose it's not really a bad thing, but I've lost sight of what's most important in life.

I wish this was all over already. I wish things would just go back to the way they were a year ago.

On the bright side, I bought myself a mini x-mas tree! :D I bought it from the bookstore and it was only 3 bucks! yaaaaay! And 12 ornaments were only 2 bucks. I'm super super happy about this. I even ran back to my apartment to set up my tree and decorate it ASAP. I really wish I had a life-sized one, but this tiny one will do for now.

Things I hate:













Studying. gr.

Things I like:

My xmas tree! I need to get lights. It looks so naked right now.


Also...

I feel like I have turned into a robot. I am never tired nor hungry anymore. Even when I go days without sleep, I'm still as awake as though I've gotten a full night's rest. Given the choice, I would never sleep since I find it a waste of time. Except I don't even study when I'm up, so I just feel really unproductive. Thus, I only sleep so I feel less guilty about not studying. Likewise for food; even when I don't eat anything all day, I'm still never hungry. I can't even remember the last time I was tired/hungry. This is so strange. I've been so restless.


...o!!<